Living life for God? Think you're doing it right? Then you discover you've gone down the wrong path! Not cultish. Not heretical. Not an evil way. But knowing much about God and His Love and His ways. Knowing it in your mind, but leaving your heart behind.
I don't mean not loving God or having heart felt moments with Him. And I don't mean God hasn't used your stroll down the wrong path to help others along the way. He will use us for good in spite of ourselves.
And, I don't mean the Lord didn't want me to start certain ventures in Christian Faith, like Rivendell!
I mean, for years I had the wow, awe, excitement, on fire heart and a really personal and intimate relationship with the Lord. My church had the wow and wonder too. I believe myself and many others in my church lost the wow, and it became about doing the business of the ministry - for the Lord of course. Somewhere we lost the wow and took ourselves to seriously. The romance died, although the devotion was there. We loved the Lord, but it was dry.
For years I struggled to get it back. Walking in the dessert, the dry and desolate places. There were oasises, revivals of that intimate love. But, I always ended up back there. Ocaisionally, I would start to revive, start walking in His full love, then before I knew it I'd realize I'd slipped out of it again, without realizing it.
To complicate the situation sin would creep in, and out of fear, desperation and lonliness I would sucumb to it. This would make the journey back to fulness harder.
Although, even when walking free from willful sin and walking upright, I still could not reconnect in that intimate way. I'd think I was on the right path again, and then I would end up back in the dessert.
Another thing that complicated the mix was just letting the things of life distract or get to me.
Over the last couple of months, and weeks escpecially, the Lord has led me to certain realizations, conversations, church meetings and media (radio/TV/Internet pages and broadcasts) that have slowly shown me the problem. God had showed me this before, and I had set myself towards it, but I let it get away from my attention.
A Life of Worship
A Life of Worship? Most people think music, a song, a 30 minute set to lift you up or focus you on God. How can we have a life of that, we gotta work, sleep and live in this world.
Love your God with all your heart, strength, soul and mind! Love God with your entire being, with your entire life! Worship means devoting your whole life to God!
Eating, breathing, sleeping, loving, working, praying, worshiping through music, cutting your grass, doing your homework, playing with your kids, walking your dog, cleaning your house (even the toliets and soap scum), changing diapers, loving those that curse you or give you a hard time, being nice to a boss or a jerk (eventhough you want to punch their lights out), the list goes on - and yes, even making love with your spouse - all to the glory of God!
Doing everything God has ordained for you to do - live life to the fullest!
Listen to Him, and go for a ride. But, don't forget Him once you get going. Aknowledge Him in all your ways, and He will keep your paths straight.
The Bible says do everything to the glory of God. Eat, drink and be merry, but do it all with, to and for the Lord.
My heart has truly worshiped Him these last two weeks. His tender mercies have broken me, broken me of the crap on my heart. The crud is washing away.
All of this life of worship I have just mentioned is how my life in Christ used to be.
This is the life I again will live from this day forward!
Eventhough, I have worshiped Him in the last few years and had many special moments, like I said, these last two weeks I have truly worshiped Him.